What People Are Saying

All these messages are from real customers who gave us permission to post them on our website.

Your His Secret Obsession course is AMAZING – one afternoon of solid listening, I’ve put it into practice and the effects are phenomenal! You truly have saved our relationship and, while it is only a week later, we are already going from strength to strength. And we both see a wonderful future ahead of us. From the bottom of my heart, thank you.

Best investment ever!!!

Claudia H.

Thank you James!

I found reading His Secret Obsession very inspiring in helping me to understand my husband and has help me to overcome many anger issues I have had with him for what he did to me and our marriage 26 years ago.

I have found peace with your readings too and I find all your blogs very helpful and useful.

I will be forever grateful to you for sharing your works with not only me but for all the other wives, girlfriends and women who read your works.

I thank you for saving my marriage!


Your research and advice was invaluable.

My boyfriend has changed from being distant and too busy to see me – and now the opposite is true.

I kept being patient for ages. Then I read the section about not bottling it all up, fuming inside. Instead I told him by text how I felt – in a nice way, full of compliments.

He immediately asked to see me, he couldn’t wait!

We had a lovely time, and I listened well, talked a bit, following your guidance on the power and beauty of silence.

I could write a lot more, but for now, I just want to say thank you, thank you x 100!


I’m 64 years old. Most likely a bit older than most of the people who read this blog (I’m so old I’m not even sure if it’s called a blog!

I was constantly searching for love. I was sure something was wrong with me because I could never find it. I was always falling for the wrong man. I found physical and emotional abusers. If I loved them they didn’t love me. And if they loved me I didn’t love them. Looking back now, I know I stunk of desperation.

And I was looking so hard that I ignored red flags and saw things in men that weren’t really there. I didn’t marry until I was 33 years old. I stayed in a bad marriage longer than I should have —-17 years —- and I’ve been divorced for going on 14 years. It took me until I was 63 years old to find the man I’ve been searching for all of my life and he just asked me to marry him this past Christmas.

Looking back now, I wish I had just relaxed and enjoyed my footloose and fancy free 20’s, instead of struggling so hard to find love and marriage. And I didn’t learn anything from my disastrous marriage. I laid low for more than 10 years, afraid of getting burned again, then fell into the same pattern of desperation, even more fearful than before because I believed I was too old and it was too late for me to ever find love.

Then I discovered this blog. The wise words of James Bauer have been a godsend for me. I finally learned to play it smarter, relaxed and turned it over to God. And guess what! Love found me!

I know this message is long and most people won’t have the patience to read all the way through it. It I hope enough people read this last —-

Be patient. Let go of the desperation. Read this blog. Take the free advice that is given here and maybe even buy a lesson or two. And maybe you’ll find the man you’ve been looking for all of your life. And chances are much better, thanks to the advice given here, you won’t blow it.

Best of luck.


Hi James,

I just wanted to let you know, I used your tip about getting his curiosity going (I told him I learned something about Dumbledore that he would never believe!) and it worked so well! He texted me right back and I asked if he could guess, and we ended up with this great ongoing text with him very curious about what the answer is, and me telling him how what great guesses he was making!

Thank you!


Dear James,

This email came in spot on and just in time to save the day. It is so unbelievably true what you said about indifference and how contagious it could be if care is not taken.

For two days up until I read this email, I hadn’t heard from my boyfriend which is a tad unusual, especially as he is off on Thursday nights through the weekend. Yet, it didn’t seem to bother me seeing as I didn’t even miss him. Then this morning, it dawned on me that he could be feeling as indifferent just as much or even a little bit more than myself since he did not bother calling me. So when I read your email this morning, I was like “That’s it … indifference… ” So I called him thereafter and tried to shake things up a little bit and now he is picking me up after work to spend the night at my place.

Thank you very much, coach. Please keep it coming.


I love your notes! I have become a happier, more productive and positive partner with all of the things you have taught me! Thank you!


James, everything you say in your notes makes so much sense. Why don’t we all know this intuitively? I appreciate the coaching up. I’m so glad I saw your ad. Your information has inspired me to strive for the life and relationship I have wanted for so long but did not have the courage to seek.

Thank you!

Patricia P.


This may be one of the most meaningful guidances I’ve come across. It is a very worthy exercise. Thank you!

P.S. I still enjoy following you very much!


Wow. That was amazing. I met my ex today and I applied your methods onto him. And omg it worked!!!!!(they made so much sense too) He was really affectionate and apologizing for not treating me better the whole time I was with him!!!! Thank you so much for this article. Also I noticed that you’ve been answering peoples comments on the website helping other women out there. That is super generous of you  (of course no pressure, I know you can’t possibly answer EVERYONE) but I just have to say that you seem to genuinely care and want the women to succeed in relationships. So awesome.

Jung P.

Oh.my.gosh it worked. I texted my ex bf (been broken up for 6 months dated just shy of 3 yrs) yesterday morning and he surprised me at night by coming up behind me where he knew I would be and said So what is this question you have? Then he took me out to dinner/drinks.

Elisa L.


You think you have done a great job being passionate and inclusive in relationship advice. Thank you.

For someone like me who has experienced childhood trauma and knows nothing about relationships your knowledge goes far. I’ll keep on reading.


Darlene P.

I am totally happy with this course. It has revived my confidence and given me a sense of control. I used to do some of the things mentioned in your course (before ever reading your material) but I had no real target.

Your explanation of tapping into the hero instinct was the target to help me focus. I already used 1 thing I learned & already saw immediate positive results! I was amazed! I haven’t even finished reading all modules yet but I intend to reread them many times.


Amazing!!! I purchased your Irresistible Insights and they are an absolute gold mine of advice. Looking forward to getting more, truly worthwhile products here.


James (and his team?),

Just a quick note to thank you. I’ve been married for 6 years now, and my husband and I come from military backgrounds. After his most recent deployment he came home different, and not in a good way. Let me be honest, it was bad…silent house, minimal intimacy, filed for paperwork at one point-bad…we moved and reorganized priorities after that, but he still pulled away and often in his head.

I learned about minimizing and focusing on myself at that point, spent a lot of time reading and introspection and trying new things. It seemed to help some because the fighting and silence went down but it still wasn’t much fun.

I got your program a week or so ago (excellent marketing by the way, I was pleased), and decided to start with the 11-word text for a situation I was having at work. No kidding, he called me in four minutes. I spent two or three minutes on the phone, thanked him for his insights and went on my way.

I’ve been steadily reading through my purchases and recently decided to ask him about his work situation. He expressed his frustrations and so I switched and asked him what his dream life would be based on your recommendations on how to phrase the question.

TWO HOURS LATER…he values freedom, appreciation, and mastery of his skills. It was one of the most insightful times I have had to listen to my beloved.

Subsequently, he’s now looking at a new job, he starts explaining the concepts to me today and I replied by reiterating how this job might meet his needs for freedom and appreciation. He. Lit. Up.

I told him I had his back and that I respected his courage to pursue a life of provision through his dreams. Big sweet kiss earned for that one!!

In all, it’s not perfect, but we are improving where it counts. I have a significantly improved appreciation for connecting with my handsome and wanted to say thank you for the multiple resources. Worth every penny!

Have a wonderful evening,


Hi James,

You are sharing great wisdom. Thank you for that!!

Also, I started reading through your course on The Hero Instinct. It’s the first course I am working on, and I find it amazingly eye-opening.

The information you are providing and the way you present it resonates deeply with me and is inspiring. Thank you for sharing important insight. It’s helping me a lot to improve my understanding of people and situations. And, I am positive this newly gained and growing awareness will help me a lot. I do enjoy reading your scripts.

The information you share is not shallow and obvious, but it runs deep. I find it very meaningful and enriching.

Thank you and be well,


I felt the same way about my long distance relationship and used the programs from James Bauer and Michael Fiore… I bought everything they offered and used the tools… it all worked! It was a valued asset to invest in my life long love… worth so much more because of my true happiness and ability to find a wonderful man and love and be loved the way we deserve to be… priceless! Now my distant and cold relationship has responded perfectly for me man… he’s hot and flooding my email with responses and has even committed himself verbally to me… turns out he was busy and focusing on some family issues and work…if I had followed my first female instinct to talk to him… it would have made him more distant… instead I just used all the tools to attract and text him romantic phrases and in no time we were back better and closer than before!!


Hello James,

You are an excellent source of material for the “happy life”, full of deep philosophy and potent insight into the sticky situations which we, as women, often have to face.

Thank you for all your advice which has helped me more than you will ever know!




I have no way to thank you, and tell you how much I appreciate all the information you give us on your course, teaching us to be cousinous or just like you said, teaching us fishing.

In this world with a huge attack information, many times we get lost and anxious, sometimes we get the answers about what to do but we don’t know how were they got, why is that result, so at the end we finally finish falling on many mistakes, is like trying to make mathematics work by only getting the results but never been taught how, why, where does it come from?, but when we are taught from internal being the way to learn is beautiful and your being feels comfortable instead anxious.

Your work is invaluable, thank you so much to allow it to be accessible!


Just wanted you to know I am deeply impressed with your teaching style. The respect misunderstanding has been my main obstacle with men. You seem to hold the keys and the way you are providing a consciousness tweaking along with examples of subtle changes showing respect is the best teaching about men I have found so far.

I only regret not buying the entire package, have grown defensive of the click bank funnel approach to add ons because of getting so many that were not worth the $$ or valuable in any way. This is the first course I have regretted not doing so.

Really really valuable!!

Thanks so much,

Pam M.


they finally contacted me yesterday and quickly took care of the issue. thank you very much for your quick response. There is nio need for James to get involved at this time if he has not already.

I am very thankful for the information that I have gotten from James. It helped me meet and keep my man.

(A wedding announcement was attached to this email, she’s on her way to being happily married because of James’ work.)

Thank you James for teaching me how to show respect to this amazing man! I feel very grateful.


Thank you so much for this course!

I love the specific examples and how u write out details of different scenarios! It’s so important when learning how to act and speak in a different way! I would love to read more detailed examples of the types of speech to use in a relationship to best bring out the love and admiration in a relationship.

Thanks again! Love the course, I am looking forward to ur first and lengthy published book on the subject! I hope u r working on publishing one!!


I have to say James I was a bit skeptical at first when I was starting this program of yours. I’m married have been for 12 years, this is a second marriage for both of us. Your words on respect are SPOT ON! He has done a complete turn around since I started talking to him in a different way.

WOW to be honest I was upset with myself at first because we really could not afford for me to spend the money on the program. But it has saved my marriage (so far) I hope in the long run forever. Just wanted to take a minute to tell you thanks!


Hope this gets through. Just want you to know how very much I DO appreciate your thoughts and insights in these emails!!!

PLEASE don’t stop. You are so insightful and have helped me so much.


What a beautiful thing to say. Thank you, I needed this today. I left my husband of 25 years for this reason, and I have been heart-sick and broken hearted ever since. I left my baggage at the door, but couldn’t quite leave the rejection there. I have been applying the principles you have taught me and I have a wonderful man in my life who has just told me that he respects me! I thought I was going to burst! What a relief to find a diamond! Thank you.

Connie P.

You are so helpful to me James. You care about the situation I am going through right now. I believe one day your help will put me into a better position with my beloved one.

Thanks indeed.




I absolutely love your disclosure At the end of your emails. I continue to grow even more fond of you as an author and coach.

Thank you for being so authentic!!!



Dear James,

I would like to say that you are the most wonderful relationship coach! Since I bought your product months ago and subscribing to your emails, I can conclude this. Other relationship coaches / experts.. they give emails that aren’t really that sincere. There is always somehow a commercialised aspect to it. However with your emails, you are sincere with your words and not afraid to share extra thoughts to help others. Your emails are calming and mind-opening. At times, quite philosophical. Makes the readers more knowledgeable. May God bless you even more.

I’m writing this just to give a compliment and a great pat on the back.



Discover What Men Secretly Want

There is a deep-seated “Gap” in communication that very few women (or men) understand. It’s the #1 reason why men pull away. To be truly irresistible to a man, you MUST understand this gap, and the way feelings of love get confused and entangled in a man’s mind.